A FUNNY JOKE

A middle aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital.While on the operating table she had a near death Experience Seeing God she asked "Is my time up?" God said, "No, you have another 43 years, 2 months and 8 days to live. Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a facelift, liposuction, and a tummy tuck. She even had someone come in and change her hair color. Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as well make the most of it. After her last operation, she was released from the hospital. While crossing the street on her way home, she was killed by an ambulance. Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had another 40 years? Why didn't you pull me from out of the path of the ambulance?"

God replied, "I didn't recognize you."

May 20th. My brother got married. (see his fine photo below my own fine photo.) What an amazing wedding. And even more important, he looks so happy. Its strange how people evolve. I still remember playing "cars" with my brother in our bedrooms when we were 5. What is "cars," you ask? Well it basically consists of me, my brother David, and a whole bunch of matchbox cars on the floor. What happens next is we take said matchbox cars and roll them back and forth as if they are moving, all the while making such noises like "Brooommmm, brrrooommmmm, " signifying a cars engine of course. Then we say things like,"I'm coming over!", announcing our visiting arrival to the other persons home I suppose. This is followed by taking the matchbox car with your hand, and moving it slightly forward, as if driving over to the persons house. And thats pretty much it. Thats "cars." The thing is, this would satisfy us for HOURS. Literally. Another thing we used to do as young kids was play parts on TV shows. This is something I, as the older sister, sort of forced upon my brother, because at the time he wasnt as strong as me and I could beat him up. (much like Lucy and Linus. And he had a "blanket" too, except it was called "Big Baby" and it was basically a throw pillow wrapped in a sheet with a painted on horrifying face.) This is a bit embarrassing, but hey, where else to completely humiliate yourself but inside a BLOG that maybe 6 people will read, right? So ... playing parts on TV. Now remember, we were no older than 3 or so at the time. We would watch Sesame Street. There was one "skit" they used to do where they would sing this song and count up in it,"1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12...doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo..." then theyd pick one number and focus on it, like "ELEVEN!!" So while they are singing "eleven, eleven eleven", there is, on the screen, a big ball that would roll along; down hills, through tunnels, etc. Well at the end the ball would roll over a slide type of thing. So I would say to my brother "I'm the Ball! You have to be the slide!" Then he would lie face down on the floor and I would precede to roll over him. Good times. Later, when we got older, we replaced Sesame Street with "Laverne and Shirley," where at the beginning of each show, I would yell, "I'M LAVERNE! YOU HAVE TO BE SHIRLEY! YOU HAVE TO!" as if A. being Laverne was some sort of privalege, and B. being Shirley was understood as punishment; because Shirley was uncool and lame. Then we would watch the show with the knowledge of our assigned characters, and somehow it all made sense. Then, even later, Laverne and Shirley were again replaced with "The Odd Couple." For some unexplained reason, whenever this show came on, my brother and I got into the habit of running wildly into the living room where my parents were watching, and "performing" the instrumental theme song for them. My brother would pretend to play one instrument, and I the other. We had no clue, of course, what instruments were actually in the song, so he would mock-play a synthesizer/piano of sorts, while I was the master on sax. I still dont know why the hell we did this, but it amused my parents nightly. They always would laugh at us being "silly," and we got some bizarre satisafaction out of it too.

And so now, that same person is married; with a wife and a new home. Very odd. I am happy and proud of him though. Its a great thing. And it makes me think about my own upcoming wedding; how it flies by so fast. How in just 5 months, everything and nothing will be entirely different.